onepassingnight | oo1｡ watching, waiting for something

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oo1｡ watching, waiting for something

[ A city seemingly consumed by shadows, sparse light only provided from empty buildings and the occasional street lamp, unless one counts the neon lights that line some of the edges of said empty buildings. There are some piles of rubble, blocking a number of the streets and the only way around them is through the alleyways that contain even darker shadows that than the whole city itself. The sole reason for the shadows overtaking the city- a bright moon in the shape of a heart lighting the sky, partially blocked by a towering skyscraper that seems to be in the center of the city, shining like some sort of beacon for all to head towards.

And at the base of it stands a lone person dressed in a black coat with their hood drawn, not moving for the moment.

Perhaps the reason for said coat is the block out the rain that's falling, a harsh wind blowing once in awhile in tandem with the thoughts going through said person's mind. Or perhaps it holds another purpose. Whatever the reason, he doesn't seem to be moving from his spot anytime soon, gaze turned upward to the sky and possibly looking at the heart shaped moon. Or maybe the castle that can be barely seen at this vantage point.

But if one could see into his thoughts, questions whirl in almost chaos, unrest there as he tries to piece a puzzle together despite all the pieces not being there. Fragments are missing and he can only do so much before needing to go off and find the rest of them. But will this place offer said answers?

Why?

What's going on?

How did it get to be like this?

Where's Sora?

He doesn't know but he's hoping that it will.

Because he's tired of not knowing, of being left in the dark. He wants to know and he won't stop until he figures everything out.

First step is always the hardest though. ]

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[She's not alright. As her breaths come too fast, as her head feels ready to explode caught in a vise, she is not alright. She doesn't want this! She's spent years driving these memories out, telling herself the way she remembers it is the right way and these visions are the hallucinations.

But each time she sees them (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hBWo3_1FCJ8), it challenges that careful wall she's built up around her perceptions. What if it wasn't always loneliness and being left behind? What if there was something real in that outstretched hand and that smile?

Impossible! She grits her teeth against the very thought as another wave of that pain hits the back of her head. Battle, monsters, enemies from beyond her world and her dimension, she can handle without trembling. These ever-present, impossible questions undo her.

She lies. Her voice comes out unnaturally harsh with the effort.]

I'm fine. It's nothing.

[To make it true, she clenches her fits tight until she can shoulder her thoughts again, turning away from the building. Her eyes are wild as she turns back to Roxas, her muscles tense.]

What is that place? [She asks it now like a demand. She has to know.]

[ This small scene seems eerily familiar to him, probably because he's been through something like it himself, more often lately than ever before. He doesn't know her circumstances for having an episode like this, but if it's anything like his own, then he can understand. And trust him when he says it's not fun.

Gaining memories that aren't his own, then realizing the reason why you're getting said memories, the reason for your existence. It shatters everything you've known, everything you thought to have known. All that remains are unanswered questions.

Roxas doesn't take her words for truth but doesn't call her out on it because he knows he would have responded the same way.

Instead he doesn't meet her gaze, returning his eyes to the skyscraper that they're standing in front of. ]

It's called Memory Skyscraper. [ So his vague memories tell him. ] That's all I really know about it.

[ But from the brief experiences he's had with it, he can guess what it does, what it shows to a person. Memories, of course. Even ones that are suppressed deep inside a person's mind and heart, because they never truly forget, just think that they do. And with him, he has more than his own to deal with. ]

[She gradually composes herself. These visions used to spur her to seek out more, to want to find that missing part of herself, to know for once and for all just who she was before she was this. Now, having received these memories and having also received even harsher blows, she labels them nothing but a nuisance.]

They're lies.

[She doesn't know if she hopes he'll agree, or if she hopes he'll tell her the memories seen in this tower are absolute truth.

Then it occurs to her. This boy beside her, equally caught in the spell but watching the tower with such bright fascination, is the same as her: searching for that unknown part of himself.]

You should judge what you see for yourself, too.

[ From beneath his hood, he gives a questioning look though she most likely doesn't see it at all, shadows continuing to hide his face into obscurity. But he wonders what she means by "lies," wonders just what it is she's referring to. The memories maybe? But that shouldn't be right because just how exactly can memories be lies?

But then he remembers his time in Twilight Town, the vague memories he has of going to school and hanging out with his friends from summers before. Times at the beach and just lazing about in the Usual Spot. All those afternoons at the clock tower...

Most of those had been lies, hadn't they? Given to him by someone who just wants to use him, make him return to where he should go back to. All lies.

And yet. ]

What's there to judge? I already know what it means to me.

[Memories are fleeting. And Roxas, beneath his cloak that refuses to reveal him, has said very much what led her to decide it was a choice in the first place. She nods, conceding that point.]

However, you should decide what it means once you're sure it's true. [She allows for the possibility that what he's seen is, indeed, true; but nothing should be built on memories that never happened.]

[ Truth. That's all he's ever asked for ever since the questions came about, wanting to know what the odd things happening to him are, wondering why it has to be him to sacrifice all he knows for a person he hasn't even met yet. Wondering why his existence needs to be erased, all for the sake of someone else.

And what does he get for his questions? Half answers and vague notions. None of it means much of anything to him.

Solid answers, reasons without doubt, that's all he wants. ]

I'll decide whenever I get the answers I want. [ His head shifts to look at her. ] Until then, I'll believe what I know to be the truth.

[In some worlds, that special someone else is the one who erased her existence. She understands his bitterness so completely.

She doesn't understand the parts of him that will eventually connect with Sora; not yet.]

That's the best way. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise. [And, she can't quite bring herself to say because it's too revealing, don't stop looking.]

Heh, I've already had people do that.

[ A wry laugh, he recalls his last moments before finally meeting the one person he's been wanting to see and talk to, yet doesn't get the chance because it's too late. There'd been no chance to talk, no more chances to turn around and escape. But the questions remain and now he wants to know. ]

I just want to know why.

[She knows, despite the similarities growing up like mushrooms after a rain, that his situation is not exactly the same as hers; logic dictates that much. So she asks it.]

Why what? What answer are you still looking for?

There's a lot I want to know.

[ So many things he wants to remember, especially his past and what exactly leads him to do whatever it is he did before being captured and tossed into a digital world. And then the reasons why Sora is chosen and not he, despite being able to use the Keyblade too. Everything is still a jumbled mess in his head and he needs time to sort things out, but the questions will always be there. ]

But mostly.. I just want to know why it has to be the way it happened.

[That's a question she's echoed for all these past several years: Why is it like this?]

Then what? Stay still and let it all happen if the 'why' is enough?

What do you mean by that?

[ It's already happened, hasn't it? He'd been there, not able to turn back from the merging. They said it was necessary for him to go back, so that Sora could wake up properly. What else is there for him to do besides keeping wondering why. ]

Or, think of it another way. Should you really have to suffer and wonder why it happened this way?

Or should you make things happen the way you want?

... It's too late for that.

[ No matter how much he wants his own life, to forget what he's learned and live normally, he knows that it'll never happen that way. Not when he's discovered all that he has, which isn't much but it's enough. ]

So you're going to just accept that? Not do anything?

Like I said, it's already too late.

[ He might be here, wherever here is, but regardless there's nothing more he can do if he's already with Sora. ]

I want to know why, that's all.

[It's a tangle of complications, not unlike her own frustrated wondering.]

Is there someone who can give you that answer? Demand it from them.

Maybe.

[ Though really there's only one person he can think of. ]

I'd have to find them first.

Find them. There's your next task.

It shouldn't be difficult, here. Your mind dwelling on it will bring them right to you.

I plan on it.

[ Though he doesn't know if Sora can actually appear here, but it's something he'll hold on to in order to appease the questions he has for the moment.

He turns his gaze back to her, taking a moment to decide if he should do this. She did help, sort of. It wouldn't hurt, right?

Hands move the hood back just enough to show his face, blue eyes and blond hair. ]

I'm Roxas, by the way.

[So they finally come to it; and the funny thing is, she's not feeling slighted anymore. It feels natural.]

Pleased to meet you.

[The polite phrase clearly comes from strong habit; but at least she does say it. And then, she may surprise him.]

We've met before. However, that was a 'different you'.

[Mercury, between her time in Econtra, the nexus, and now the dream world, has had plenty of time to become accustomed to alternates.]

Different me?

[ Confusion takes over his face at hearing that, wondering what it is she means. ]

There's only one me.

[ He is himself, not some clone or half of someone else, despite what he knows is the truth. So he isn't sure just what she means by that statement. Did that mean that Sora is here? Or... ]

[She knows it's difficult, even impossible, to believe what she's saying; but this time, she treats it seriously, without mocking.]

You're the only 'you' in your world. [This much, she takes for true, even with what very little she knows about his connection to Sora. Even if she knew it all, he is still Roxas, himself, the only Roxas of his world.]

However, there are other worlds, other dimensions. 'You' exist there, too.

[ Considering the fact that he knows there are other worlds out there, have been to a good number of them himself, he guesses that it isn't totally weird to think that there are different dimensions and stuff out there as well. The idea is still far fetched but. It's possible too. ]

So there's another "me" here, then?

[ Hearing that doesn't sit well with him. If there is another him here, how would they be compared to him? Would this other him been.. chosen over Sora? Would he be able to live however he wants?

Just how different would an alternate him be like. ]

[Not much different, in her experiences. People don't tend to vary enormously. In Econtra, they had a saying for it: 'many people but the same soul'. Of course, there are exceptions to any rule, and occasionally she comes across very different alternates of people she knows.]

Perhaps you'll also meet. But be careful. Two of the same shouldn't be in the same space-time. Being alternates from different worlds, it might be alright, but you run a risk if it's truly a future or past 'you'.

and this is why he pings me. also, sorry slow; was doing dishes quick xD

ffff sorry this took so long DX oh LJ

No worries! Same on this end: I'll tag as I can, but lateness/slowness is LJ's fault :/

yep it's always LJ's fault 8|

of course! also, i love these two T_T <333

asldkfjsdl <333

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