onepassingnight | Secret Report I: Junon, Meetings and Truth

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Secret Report I: Junon, Meetings and Truth

It had been a hurried few weeks since the fiasco with the Remnants, something that wasn't helped along by the fact that there were some wounds that even a full cure couldn't completely heal and the exceedingly strange dreams he'd been having lately.

Not to mention the apparent newfound telepathic link with people.

It had given Tseng a lot to think about while sorting through the mess things had become to see what could be salvaged and what needed to be disposed of. He'd taken a few days to travel to Junon, he'd needed to sleep in his own home and bed for once and had told Cloud during one of the telepathic episodes that he'd meet him there.

So he sat outside the small coffee shop on the corner of his street every day reading and waiting for him to show up. He's not in his suit, though his clothing choice has never varied far from the dark colors he so often inhabits. His sweater is a pale blue, zipped against the chilly sea wind and to help disguise the bulk of bandages. The one on his face is still present though, and it will likely leave a scar.

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He's been coming.

He's had a lot to deal with himself, though most of his focus has been on a newly cured little boy and a fractured family he's determined to put right. Fixing up an old church and avoiding well wishers hasn't been far behind it. But he's still got deliveries and he hasn't forgotten the strange moments when he was hearing voices with disturbing clarity.

He doesn't call ahead. He can't imagine ever telling a Turk he was coming. But he does leave Fenrir outside the shop his last delivery was at and head off to find a certain secluded and probably unassuming section of the city. The main blade of his sword stays with him and people know enough to stay out of his way, but he's not looking for trouble. He's looking for answers.

It's a Cloud thing that he manages to find Tseng after a short amount of seemingly aimless wandering and several unrelated side conversations with absolute strangers. He might have ended up promising to help someone find their dog but he'll figure that out later. It occurs to him that he's still a little crazy, or that it might have just all been fever and pain, but it's something he needs to do as he comes to a stop in front of Tseng's table. It's either going to make sense or not when he says:

"I'm here."

Tseng's sure that Cloud has always been a bit crazy, the guy was capable of pulling of stunts so insane that it was questionable that even Reno would attempt them. Then again he's not exactly a poster child for sanity himself, no Turk was.

"So you are." His tone is mild as he closes the book he'd been reading. "It's good to see you on your feet again, how are Miss Lockhart and the children? We can talk here, or go up to the house."

He pauses a moment, taking in to consideration the sword at Cloud's back. "If you'd like to kill me I'd prefer not to do it here though. Harriet doesn't need the mess."

"What?"

It's not that he's unaware of the sword on his back so much as simply used to it, an almost-not quite extension of himself, and it takes him a minute to realize that Tseng might not see it the same way. He carried it before but given recent events, that weight has only gotten more standard. That - and who goes to visit a Turk unarmed? A shake of his head though.

"You're too hard to kill. Besides - it would upset Aerith." He can say the name now. It's okay. The ribbons still marks his arm but it's not a brand anymore. He's not sure what it is but it doesn't feel as if he has to wear it or risk forgetting the way it used to. A glance around the cafe and a subtle shift of his heavy steel toed boots at how quaint it is and how he doesn't exactly fit the setting. The cinnamon buns on display smell tempting though. Blue eyes shift to focus on Tseng again and he thinks they're on the same page, as strange as that page may be, but he's not entirely sure yet.

"You tell me. You're the one doing the talking." And, belatedly: "Tifa and the kids are fine. ... Thanks."

Tseng was used to Rude's way of conversing with eyebrows and shrugs so it wasn't terribly hard to read the blond hero. It occurred to him that Cloud knew next to nothing about him, and never really had. He'd be joining a rather exclusive group of people who'd even actually seen the Turk's house, let alone been inside or knew it's rough location.

Tseng was a private person, and while he didn't exclude anyone he didn't welcome them with open arms either.

"We can get something here and eat on the porch, or inside if you feel up to it." He said finally, standing and pushing the chair in. "I live just up the street."

"Okay." Tseng's a Turk and so Cloud is never going to let his guard down entirely even if they really did have a few head conversations. He kind of thinks it might be insulting to a Turk if he ever did for that matter. He's comfortable enough around them now though, less worried about attempts to kill him and more about hidden knowledge they're ferreting away. And despite their reputation for assassination, they'd always been pretty straight forward when they were trying to kill him. He likes to think it's a curtsey by this point if they ever decide to try again. So he'll go inside or outside Tseng's house, whichever the other man thinks is more appropriate.

Right now his attention is on those rolls. And maybe some of the hot ham and cheese rolls next to them too.

Tseng had no intention of trying to kill Cloud- barring the blond going insane and trying to burn entire cities to the ground of course, but at that point he was confident that Cloud would understand.

"Order whatever you want." Tseng offered, gesturing at the display.

Pale brows go up just a little at the offer but he's not about to turn it down. Free food is free food and if he hadn't already known it before, his days in the Shinra army certainly taught him to eat whenever possible. Moving over to the register, he opts out of the cinnamon buns and orders a half dozen of the hot ham and cheese rolls. And two of the pastries with the chocolate centers as well as two cupcakes. Tifa has a weakness for those pastries and Cloud isn't above letting Tseng foot the bill for her surprise. The cupcakes are for the kids. Once everything's boxed up and tied together with a string, he picks them up and moves to the side, surprisingly adroit about moving around a small area with a huge sword strapped to his back. His eyes focus on Tseng. Still testing out just how crazy he just might be.

If he knew about it, he'd appreciate the vote of confidence that no one's trying to kill him yet for it.

"We've been talking. A lot lately. Haven't we?"

Tseng quirked a smile, letting the cashier take care of the bill. "We certainly have, though I'm not sure how you got my number. Though I'm sure there's a good reason." He replied calmly.

Cloud probably didn't need to know that Tseng could likely buy the entire store out for the next few years and still have enough to live off of. He'd been on ShinRa's payroll for a few decades and Turks had always been paid rather well, after all you didn't want the people who knew all your secrets to be able to find a better offer for them, or kill you over a quibble on the decimal place's location. Poorly paid assassins were the downfall of many a government.

"If you're ready then." He offered, "I must admit I prefer speaking with people face to face whenever possible. Not that it can always be done, fate and distance make some things impossible."

He was being deliberately vague, hoping that Cloud had spent enough time with Vincent to catch on that some discussions weren't to be had where anyone could overhear.

It catches him for a minute because he hasn't been calling Tseng on the PHS and the talk about getting the Turk's number doesn't make sense. He rolls with it though because he's gotten so used to rolling with things that don't make sense over the years and so there's not really much flicker of expression on his face to indicate anything, both at the confusion and seconds later when the confusions clears up because Tseng's speaking in code. That's... new. Cloud can understand not wanting strangers to overhear incriminating things but he's also used to talking about things no one understands anyway. Even when people do listen in on the conversations he has with most of his friends, they don't understand what's being said.

Especially if it's Barret talking.

So he just grunts to show he gets it and follows the other man out of the shop. He'll let Tseng chose when and where they start their discussion but they're definitely going to have one now. Tseng wouldn't be talking in code unless he was talking about the fact he really has been in Cloud's head offering advice. Which both means Cloud's going to have to adjust to the thought that if Tseng's voice has been real than maybe the others have too and for him, hearing voices is considered a bad thing - and two that means Tseng's going to start keeping him in the loop about what's going on in the secret places of Gaia. He chooses to temporarily focus on the second because at least that way he'll be useful and they won't have another Sephiroth sneaking up on them again. The first -

how's he supposed to tell Tifa if he's started hearing voices again?

Tseng was used to people trying to listen in to conversations, looking for that one snippet of information that would upset the delicate balance of power and influence he held reign over. Call him paranoid, but caution had always been his first move in any situation.

He leads the way a few buildings up the street, past a bookstore and turning down an alley between a convenience store and a shop with far too many kitschy necklaces and glaringly colored scarves in the window to be pleasant to look at for terribly long. The house situated behind the buildings was a small two story affair with a pair of cars and a lawn that looked in need of watering, it had at one point been a guest house to the mansion that had long since burned down and been replaced by the businesses. There was a porch with a pair of pots with flowers on either side of the front door and a side entrance with an empty laundry line beyond the vehicles.

It was downright domestic.

"There aren't any booby traps, I appologize; zoning laws." He said, pausing on the steps for a hesitant moment before continuing to the door. It hadn't been locked and he led the way in, toeing his shoes off in the entrance.

Just as small inside, there was a distinct lack of a proper dining room, or very much seating for more than a small handful of people, but it was nice enough. "Make yourself at home."

The house throws him a little and a part of him is waiting for Tseng to push the button cleverly concealed in the mailbox so that the whole thing tips up and backward and a secret lair folds over in it's place.

He'll admit, it's a bit of a let down when that doesn't happen.

He also notices the flowers and his eyes linger on them for a moment before going back to Tseng. He recognizes the joke but isn't sure how to react so he just makes a sound low in his throat. Tseng telling jokes? Today is full of surprises. If he notices the hesitation about bringing him inside though, he doesn't show it, though he does frown and then lean down to go through the process that's a little more detailed to remove his steel toed boots. They do tend to track mud though and he leaves them surprisingly neatly next to Tseng's. Which feels... weird, so he's going to ignore that too.

The sparseness of the house actually has him relaxing a little and looking around curiously. It takes him a minute to realize what's missing and then it hits him - there's no extra touches here. No crayon drawn pictures, no little feminine additions, no leftover pieces friends are forever forgetting at your place.

It's the way his office looks but without even the family pictures. Well, it's lacking a spare tire in the corner too and it's distinctly more updated and neater than his office. Tseng's invitation has him nodding and after a moment's hesitation, he heads over to the counter and sits in one of the bar stools. That's familiar at least and he sets aside his gifts for his family and opens up the box of still warm rolls, offering one to Tseng so absentmindedly it's obvious he got so many for just that reason. He figures it's safe to comment:

"Reno's a girl."

Tseng wasn't really in to secret lairs or complicated machinery, that was far more like something Scarlet or even Hojo would have had. He didn't want anything that complicated, the house didn't even have a basement.

"I noticed, though I can personally verify that the one who attempted to switch out the coffee for decaf three days ago is still male." Tseng agreed, pulling plates down to eat over. If Reno wanted to be a woman in his dreams that was none of Tseng's concern, they were still the same person. He honestly didn't care one way or another so long as Reno remained capable of doing his job.

"Personally, I'm more concerned about some of the... others who've been granted access. They seem to be more important pieces in the game; namely Aerith, Zack and Sephiroth." He frowned, taking a bite of his newly aquired roll and thinking as he chewed. "There's also the matter of people who aren't from Gaia; have you met a young woman who sometimes has blue hair?"

It's a bit of a surprise. He's used to hearing those three voices in his head and having Tseng mention them too feels almost - relieving. Not that he hasn't enjoyed hearing Zack and Aerith - despite the circumstances - he just knows that his hold on sanity and control of himself was tenuous the last time and he doesn't want to lose himself again. It was a helpless, terrifying feeling that still makes him feel sick and clammy to his stomach even remembering it now. If Tseng is hearing the same voices though -

"Ami?" that's a surprise. For some reason he didn't equate her with the others. As if she was his own private voice. Apparently Tseng's heard her too?

He hadn't heard them so much as had decidedly strange memorable dreams with them. It was close enough for Tseng's tastes.

He nodded, leaning against the stove. "She isn't someone I'd ever met before, and I've yet to meet her."

Tseng had spent a lot of time thinking about the whys, even thinking back to what he'd been raised with what felt like a million years ago in the northern reaches of Wutai.

"The only thing I can think of is that we're being equipped for something the Planet knows is coming and can't stop itself." He admitted, dark eyes looking to Cloud. "Something worse than Meteor or geostigma."

"Ami's not from Gaia. She'd never been here." Cloud's asked. She's from somewhere else entirely and their two worlds don't mix. Tseng's next words however have him shutting his eyes and he doesn't sigh but it's only because he's got a mouthful of food.

damn it.

He loves Aerith and he loves the life on it but sometimes he really hates the Planet.

Still, this is what he wanted, why he's here now. He's a protector and he can't protect if he doesn't know what to fight. So he finishes his mouthful and opens his eyes to look at Tseng. He can have a one track mind sometimes.

"How does Sephiroth figure into it? I've dreamed him as a child and also before Nibelheim. I heard the second version of him in my head while I was fighting him at the Shinra Tower."

Tseng hummed, mulling over the possibilities. There were a frightening number of them, all things considered.

"He's shown up in two of mine, a... retirement party and another in Modeoheim. Both times I believe he was from before the events of Nibelheim." He admitted, "Time may be relative to whatever it is the planet is doing, considering we've gotten Ami in our collective heads now. You may not like it, but despite what he became Sephiroth was a brilliant strategist and can very easily be a secret weapon so to speak if things go as badly as I fear."

It wasn't an ideal situation to say the least, and it certainly didn't sit well with Tseng. He honestly didn't know how quickly time would slip by between the two timeframes.

"I've... been attempting to get him to discover the truth; Lucretia and Vincent's existence. If he already knows that Hojo lied to him about who they are and puts the puzzle pieces together... Lucretia was the only woman on the team and the only people who could arge with Hojo- Vincent and Professor Gast- were both taken out of the picture." He sighed, taking a few bites of his roll.

"Sephiroth is anything but stupid, if given the real facts he's less likely to go mad when the time comes. He may kill Hojo but that's not something I would honestly worry about."

"He cracked last time." Cloud's blunt about it. He can be blunt about it. Cloud cracked as well when he was confronted with Sephiroth's lies about his existence. Cloud hasn't slaughtered an entire town - but he had given the Black Materia, and the destruction of his world, over to the enemy. The difference was that Cloud had someone to pull him back from the edge. He'd had Tifa. He'd had his friends.

Sephiroth had no one.

"He doesn't have friends to support him and hold him together any more this time than he did then." If time was in flux at least. Or else this was a parallel time or universe or something like that. Ami had talked about those in her own world. "He doesn't have anyone to pull him back from the edge and he feels just as isolated and alone as he did before. Who's to say it was the facts and not the betrayal that broke him?"

He's not arguing with Tseng. He's even done some pushing of his own in entirely different areas with the Sephiroth they both seem to hear in their heads. He's pointing out an angle he's noticed to add it to what Tseng already has. What if they can save that Sephiroth? Will it change their world? Their present? Will what they know cease to be? Will Zack and Aerith still be alive?

There's a pause and then, low, Cloud adds what he hasn't mentioned to anyone else. Because this isn't the first time he's thought about trying to change the past. It's selfish but he says it anyway. "If Hojo dies, I never become me."

"He has Zack." Tseng pointed out, "Sleep deprivation and hunger may also have played a role in the incident. Reports said Sephiroth hadn't left the library for three days. I have no idea what in the world Zack was doing for those three days, but someone should have been checking on him regularly."

Mind you, the reports also said Sephiroth jumped in to the reactor's core.

Tseng was hoping that with Sephiroth not going crazy and trying to destroy the planet would keep those two alive. Things would work themselves out from there, he firmly believed that the planet would still find a way to save things.

He fixes Cloud with a look, somewhere between empathy and pity, and sighed. "Would you put yourself through those five years if you had a choice not to? If Nibelheim hadn't happend you certainly would have made SOLDIER within that time or advanced within the army itself, or even been approached by the Turks."

"Zack did check on him regularly. And every time it was 'leave me alone'. He was obsessed with what he read in those books. He didn't stop for anyone. His identity had been taken away and he was busy making a new one."

Cloud was personally familiar with that feeling. And he knows it's not a judgement on Zack but he can't help but respond to defend his friend. He remembers that part of his past with almost painful clarity. It's something his mind has decided to latch onto and hold fast. The dank smell of the passage outside the library, the dusty smell of the books, the restless townspeople - from his own town - outside. And, thanks to the memories stolen from Zack, he remembers the mad conversation as well.

He remembers over four years of torture and knows he's never going to be completely whole again because of it.

His blue eyes lift and there isn't even the hint of hesitation or doubt in them as he firmly says:

"Yeah. I'd go through it again. I couldn't protect the people that needed me before. I can now." The hard edge relaxes just a little bit. "And you don't have to lie, Tseng. I didn't have what it took. I'd still be a Shinra grunt." Thanks to his own time with the Sephiroth that was apparently in all of their heads, he's had time to think, really think, about what both he and Tseng have apparently been doing. Those long delivery trips give him plenty of time for it.

"Zack might not have left Shinra for anything short of those experiments on us considering all he'd already stayed through. Rufus' old man might still be alive and Shinra Electric, the old Shinra Electric, could still have an iron control over everything. The planet could be two years closer to dying." He shakes his head.

"I want them back. Both of them. Aerith and Zack... And - my mom. Nibelheim didn't deserve its murder." He lifts his eyes again to look at Tseng. "Maybe we make it better if we save Sephiroth. But maybe we just make it worse. My first loyalty is to the people who count on me now and their future. Not the past." He's had that lesson thumped into him pretty hard and as much as he wants Zack and Aerith back - as tempting as it is, as much as there's a part of him that would throw away everything to save them, gamble it all - if he has to choose, he knows which one they'd want him to choose.

"If we save him and it changes our world now, it's not worth it. If we save him and it changes his world than I'll help. Ami's the one that deals with alternate worlds of hers. Maybe she'd know at least what we're risking here."

They'd had a Turk in the area, Zack had been... tooling around town according to the reports, but Zack hadn't been the one they were keeping an eye on to be honest.

"Cloud, I don't make a habit of lying or breaking rules. Omitting information I don't see as necessary to pass on and skating through loopholes is a completely different matter." There was a tiny grin at that, diving through the gaps in the iron clad armor of ShinRa's fist was quite possibly the only reason he was actually still alive.

"We, the Turks, had been keeping an eye on you since the Modeoheim incident. Why do you think you kept being put on missions we were involved with, or ones that seemed all but hand picked for your particular skillsets? I can dig out our copy of your file if you'd like to read it sometime, it's a bit... thicker than the one the rest of the company had clearance for.

"Believe me when I tell you that you wouldn't have stayed an infantryman for long. The Turks recruit at seventeen, barring special circumstances."

He chuckled a little at the mention of the deceased President. "You missed a lot, Cloud. If President Shinra had lived much longer the company wouldn't have, it was crumbling into it's own rot. I'm sure Reeve could tell you stories of board meetings that were just idle posturing and I'm not exaggerating when I say that Clod Prod was the best of Scarlet's machines. SOLDIER was also...lacking, nearly half it's members that survived Wutai deserted with Genesis and the others were at the ends of their ropes as well.

"If Sephiroth leaves ShinRa, SOLDIER will follow it and the Turks wouldn't stand in his way. Especially if he's particularly good at timing, Heidigger's a moron who couldn't lead himself out of a wet paper bag, let alone an army."

He chewed as he listened intently to Tseng. There was a lot he'd missed, both as an infantryman, as a teen with only his own focus in mind and as a result of the mako muddling what little he had caught in his time there. The mention of anyone at all noticing him though had him frowning. If Tseng said it that way, he was inclined to believe the man but - thinking back he didn't remember doing anything of particular worth, though he did remember an embarrassing incident or two. Tseng had a point though - he'd never given any thought at all as to why he ended up on the missions he did. The rest of the information about what was going on inside, things he had been too low ranking and frankly to self-centered to be aware of, he slowly digested, working it over in his head as he worked his way through his second roll. He hadn't realized it was that fragile. Shinra had seemed like the entire world when he'd been there.

He had 'sat' in on one of those meetings though and the memory of Barret crammed into an air vent brought the small smile to his lips. It had been a lot of posturing, he remembered that part easily despite the fact he'd been much more distracted by saving Aerith.

"That was a stupid name for a machine." Cloud wasn't going to argue about the merit of either of the executives he'd pasted in it. Another pause and he nodded, just a duck of his chin. "And yeah - thanks. I'd like to see that file on me."

He wasn't looking for confirmation or an ego boost but he was curious as to what they knew about him from that time period. Maybe it would jog his own muddled memory.

It still brought them back to the question of:

"Are we risking our present by changing the past with Sephiroth?"

ShinRa had been the entire world back then, but when your job was to keep it from falling apart from the inside you began to see how very fragile it was.

"I don't believe so, seeing as 'our' Reno has had no reaction when I've interrupted the one we've met in our dreams when she's not paying attention in meetings." He admitted, "I haven't had a chance to try it with Rufus however, but I'm willing to presume that he's from our version of things as there's nothing different about him."

"Hn."

It sounds sensible but Cloud's not entirely reassured. They're speculating, no matter how good Tseng is at getting the facts and doing that well and -

And Cloud doesn't want to lose his life. He's just gotten it back, he's just gotten it to the point where he's going to fix it and do it right this time and... and it feels like there's a future if he's fast enough and careful enough to grab it. If things change - if things change he loses all of that. Maybe they would change for the better but - maybe they wouldn't. And they're not just risking themselves but everyone that's alive right now. For all he knows, Sephiroth is already changing their world and he's just not aware of it because his memories are being rewritten as the past changes. It wouldn't be the first time he hasn't been able to trust his own mind.

He can't seem to not try to prod Sephiroth to freedom in their shared dreams though. He knows what being a puppet feels like and he's starting to understand that that's all Sephiroth has ever been even if it's not the same as Cloud's own experience. Still -

"Different worlds then. Like Ami's universe has." It's reassuring though if it wasn't for Ami there would take a bit more to wrap his head around it. "Maybe the Sephiroth we dream about can change his." Save Aerith and Zack. "Do you think the threat to the Planet's future is so huge it stretches to different worlds and places?"

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Secret Report I: Junon, Meetings and Truth

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