[OPEN] Valentine's Mingle

[passingmod]

Who: Everyone! Open to All
What: Valentine's Day mingle logs
When: any time generally around the holiday
Where: awkward cupid / conversation hearts / repay the gesture

Love is in the air, from chocolated Japan to cherubic America, from Victorian times to the far-off future. There are dreams of romance, candy, timid (and bold!) love confessions, and hearts everywhere.

(ooc: This is a post to keep threads together for Valentine's Day. Separate posts or additional subthreads are also fine, and this one is optional. Since some of the affects have potential to force a character's reactions icly, it may be best to discuss between the players or note your preferences/anything you'd rather avoid.)

Comments

[decaying]

I still don't know why you had to join the idiots to do it. You could have done it by yourself.

[waterfell]

[She could have. She could have shown up to the battles she chose (which she did anyway), and she could have fought for her own goals (which she did anyway). There were only two things in the way of that.

Since it's Kanda, she tells him the truth and those two things.]

The Dark Kingdom gave me even more power.

And I didn't want to be alone.

[decaying]

I can understand that. Being alone sucks.

[waterfell]

[They hadn't seemed to mind it, as far as she could see. Then again, why should they? They were the ones leaving because they had more: more to do, more to investigate on their own, more to worry about, more friends. It was just Ami who ended up sitting alone with nowhere to go, always calling after them, never persuading them to turn around.

Well, it's her turn now.

But she catches something else in Kanda's answer.]

You, too? [He also feels alone like that?]

[decaying]

I won't exactly admit it but my life is lonely.

[waterfell]

[She's not good at this. She doesn't know what to do, what to say. She wants to say the right thing, to let him know that she doesn't want him to be lonely, because she knows what loneliness can be and she knows what it can do to a person and seeing it in him is a haunting reflection of herself and she doesn't want him to feel that way.

She takes a breath. There's something comfortable about their closeness that makes it just a little easier, as she presses his hand. Her expression is entirely serious.]

Not anymore.

[decaying]

[He turned to look at her as she took his hand and he heaved a sigh.]

I know what it's like. It's terrible. I'm glad I can at least find some comfort when I close my eyes.

[waterfell]

[It's the same for me.

Sometimes, she prefers what she's found in dreams so much that it frightens her. It's too tempting, too appealing, to stay asleep forever, to look at everything she's gained and realize she's tired of letting it slip through her fingers every morning.

To not want to wake up. She has these thoughts most of all when she's with Kanda, when she realizes she doesn't feel the press of all the weight she's taken on her shoulders, that she feels lighter.

She can't quite dampen the mood with all of this, but she does ask:]

And when you wake up?

[decaying]

I feel hollow.

[That answer came too easy and it somewhat scared him.] I remember that I'm trapped in hell, that I'm surrounded by people who don't trust me and can't wait to kill me. I'm on the losing side of a war and I have no choice but to continue.

[waterfell]

[She knows that, too. She knows the feeling there's nothing to you anymore except that emptiness you don't know how to fill because the things you think you want, and even the things you truly want, don't work.

It's gotten better. A few years ago, she could have said exactly what he just did - a traitor to the senshi, mistrusted by the Dark Kingdom ready to kill her at the first wrong step (or just for pushing them too far once too often). Now they, at least, are allies. And the battles behind her so far were won.

Wordlessly, Ami pulls Kanda closer to her, in a firm embrace that emphasizes her presence.]

[decaying]

[Kanda was stunned. Despite all his time spent with Ami in their dreams, she had never really been close to him this way, at least not in a method where she could embrace him after some dark secret was spilled. He held her close, burying his face into her neck. She didn't know how much he appreciated her understanding and reacting this way. She shouldn't be cold with him.]

[waterfell]

[She could have wanted nothing more than she wanted to stay there. It seemed like the right choice - finally.]

Yu. [Her voice held the tone of someone about to ask a great favor.] Let's stay this way awhile.