onepassingnight | 002: Is this a nightmare or not?

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002: Is this a nightmare or not?

Seira scowled at the racks of dresses and gowns, arms wrapped around herself. She knew she'd have to find one that didn't make her look completely ridiculous, she couldn't wear her usual clothes to a formal affair no matter how good she looked in them. She was a girl and needed to wear a dress for this.

She didn't hate dresses, not really, but they didn't always fit or flatter her and if there was a fight it would very quickly get ripped and ruined.

"Lets get this over with." She grumbled, glancing at the person she'd come in to this potential hellhole with. Two pairs of eyes were better than one, and maybe a second opinion would find something that didn't look like a cross dresser or costume.

[OOC: Feel free to suddenly bring in a dinosaur or seven to interrupt this potential trainwreck.]

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"Thanks you capitan obvious." She muttered under her breath, rolling her eyes. While he may not have the most exciting wardrobe in the world, Sephiroth was probably going to help speed this along.

"Yeah, it is. I can't show up where all of society's high rollers are looking like homeless or something, and if I wore a uniform or my usual clothing they'd think I was trying to stage a coup, hold them hostage or kill them all." She sighed, blatantly ignoring a ruffled pink monstrosity.

"You should come with me, there'll be food, drinks, and plenty of people to try to set on fire with the force of your glare. It'll be fantastic." She grinned, only half serious. "It'd give them all heart attacks to see me in a real dress."

He decided to politely ignore the Captain Obvious remark. (Technically, it would be General Obvious.)

"There is a middle ground between appearing to be homeless and--" He broke off as he caught sight of a garment of yellow taffeta. "--something along those lines." He didn't know a great deal about women's clothing, but he knew when something was ridiculous. "I doubt you'll be suspected of trying to start a revolution, no matter what you wear. As long as your actions aren't hostile."

The idea of a party didn't interest him, but since she'd managed to convince him to go shopping, she could probably get him to attend. "I myself would rather not set anyone on fire, literally or figuratively." He would prefer that the event be painless for all those involved.

General Obvious just didn't sound quite right, and Seira honestly didn't care too much about military rank at the moment.

"You obviously missed the part where I took control of an army and unleashed a horde of monsters on the world." She grinned, "I could offer a glass of water to someone and they'd think I was up to something."

She laughed a little, "Really now? Nobody at all? I figured you'd have someone, probably one of those nutters in a lab coat."

Not that he would make one of his overly literal joking observations out loud, that is, not usually in public, as he puts on his most serious face when those he doesn't know well are watching.

"What I mean is, your garb will not make them any more or less likely to suspect you at this point, as long as you conduct yourself with decorum. And you can look respectable without looking ridiculous."

He did have a great deal of distaste and dislike for the scientists of Science Research Division, but he'd put up with them more or less stoically for this long. "A ballroom is not a battlefield," he said solemnly, "but yes, I suppose a few glares wouldn't hurt."

"It's not a matter of respectable so much as it's about looking like I haven't lost my edge siting around Fisherman's Horizon. They can't think I've gotten soft."

Even if she had, compared to charging around swinging a gunblade at the first person who deserved it.

"You've obviously never been to a political function, just because people aren't waving around weapons and getting gore everywhere doesn't mean it won't be a battlefield."

"You need not wear a dress. There are other types of formal wear." How is he involved in a conversation about clothes?

Also, why is he surrounded by so many argumentative people? Not that he isn't one himself, but he isn't arguing at the moment. He replies patiently. She's probably in a poor mood, considering the situation.

"I've been to many political functions, as a matter of fact." More than he can count. "I am not unaware of the subtleties, maneuvering, and conflicts involved, petty and otherwise. My own comment was literal and not entirely serious." In that kind of battle, he remains polite. It's best not to admit that it's a battle in any way. "Glaring is a weak weapon in any such indirect, political skirmish."

"Yeah, I do have to wear a dress. It's inappropriate for me to wear pants to something this formal unless it's a uniform and I'm not in charge of Galbadia's army anymore. Garden's semi-military and real proper about some stuff." She sighed, rolling her eyes.

"Depends on who you're dealing with really, if it's someone who's got no real experience in a fight getting a glare from someone with a giant scar on their face tends to make them back down. Most of 'em are wusses who can't fight to save their lives anyway."

"I wouldn't require that any of my subordinates wear skirts." To Sephiroth, this form of propriety seemed old-fashioned, but he hadn't had what would be considered an ordinary upbringing. However, though he himself wasn't subject to military dress code, he wasn't about to argue with it. He shrugged.

"That's hardly diplomatic, but anyone who is intimidated by a scar deserves to be."

"Which is why I like you. Other than the whole 'big scary SOLDIER with pretty hair' thing." She grinned up at him, "Skirts are seriously restrictive in movement or you're flashing your bits all over the place."

She shrugged a little, gaze drifting again. "Yeah, well, diplomacy was never my strongsuit. People are gonna think what they're gonna think and if it makes them leave me alone then fine. I don't need them getting in my way."

"Yes, precisely why I wouldn't force a warrior into a dress." If they wanted to wear one, that was another matter. He smiled. "Am I truly so frightening?" He wasn't in earnest, merely amused by her comment.

He, too, considered the dresses again, realizing he was going to have to give an opinion on them sooner or later. There was no way out at this point, if it was necessary for her to wear one. "Diplomacy can be useful." It's the only way he can deal with most of the ShinRa executives. "This may be a good opportunity to practice."

"You can be, when you're doing your 'why is there no coffee available at four in the morning you morons' or 'why have you not been killed by your own stupidity yet?' face." She grinned, glad to get a smile from him.

"I took lessons in it, but I might need a refresher." She nudged him gently, "So, any color but red, pink or yellow is good. Where should we start?"

"There should always be coffee available." That was just not a subject that was open to debate, period. "And it is a wonder most people are still alive, considering." His smile itself faded, but it left an air of good humor in its wake.

"I suspect you need more than a mere refresher," he said, but rather than providing a lesson himself, he turned toward the racks of dresses.

He was out of his depth, but his pride would not allow him to show it. He remained calm in the face of so much fine fabric. Unsurprisingly, he suggested, "Why not something black?" as his gaze searched the racks for something of that color.

"Depends on the cut." She replied vaguely, flicking through a rack of emerald ones idly. "Also, if I end up going with someone I'd have to match them. Let's say, for the sake of argument, that I'd be meeting up with Irvine there; I'd probably wear something with violet."

Despite whatever people thought, she had learned a great deal about proper etiquette at formal events. You had to learn something about what you were trying to change after all.

"How will you make a selection if you don't yet know if you're going with someone else?" He wasn't sure why the matching was necessary, because he always wore black regardless. Didn't black go with everything?

"What about this one?" He held up a dress that stood out to him for some reason.

"That's why I said you should come with me." She replied, rolling her eyes at his selection.

"If I was going to dress like you I'd have to bleach my hair and wear thigh high hooker boots." She'd look ridiculous in it and knew that. "I don't have the shoulders for it."

"I don't believe thigh high boots necessarily have anything to do with prostitution, and your hair wouldn't need to be the same color as mine. You'd look fine, and if you wanted me to attend, it would go well with my suit."

He stubbornly indicated another, hanging next to the first. "This one may be similar, but the shoulders are different."

She let out a huff of air, "It's a formal event, it should be a long gown. More like this one." She held it up for him. "I could certainly wear something gray or green and we'd still compliment. Black isn't the only color on the planet."

He's not used to not knowing things, but he must admit he didn't know that that was a strict rule, considering the things Scarlet wore to such events. So he nodded. "I see." He looked over this new offering, thoughtfully, before deciding, "I like it."

That was a dress, and she had suggested it, and he approved, so now they could leave, his manner seemed to say. Simple as that.

Scarlet had no class, not that Seira really had much more but she had a different persona to keep up.

"You would say that, wouldn't you." She teased, putting it back. "I think this one would be better, it'd work for a lot more events. Let me go try it on and then we can go do something else. Like pick out ties for you or make glary-faces at screaming children."

"Very well." Sephiroth was ready to agree. Although he did like the other dress better, his feelings on the matter weren't strong enough for him to mention it. He was sure this dress would do just as well. This was one area where he was willing to admit that someone else knew more than he did, a rare occurrence indeed.

"I can wait for you here." He was conscious of how he stood out among the racks of dresses, but he was willing to bear with it, giving another faint smile at her plans for them.

"When you're done, we can start with the ties."

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002: Is this a nightmare or not?

OMG. I love you.

Haha, I aim to please

The whole concept here is hilarious, given who they are.

Yes, that was my thought as well! :D

Re: Yes, that was my thought as well! :D

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