Allowing himself only a moment's worth of hesitation, still staring up at Adam as if he could force things to make sense simply by looking at the other man, Peter finally finds the motivation to slip around the other and begin to walk. It's astonishingly odd to simply expect Adam to begin to follow, and maybe if Peter was more honest with himself he would realize that it's odd to expect anything at all. From anyone, let alone Adam. But he's trying not to over think it; Peter no longer enjoys letting the pieces fall where they will, but even in his own dreams he has next to no control.
Lifting his face once more onto the sight of empty streets, Peter notes that Adam's presence alone makes things feel far less darkened over, the shadows not nearly as deep. Every time he finds himself stuck here, he spends his time searching. Looking for all the guilt he's tucked away into the corners of his mind, keeping it hidden until he's willing to spare the time to spread it all out, to inspect it until it's all he becomes. But with someone else, with Adam, it's easier to keep all of it covered. Or maybe it's all that much harder.
Just like the touch at his elbow, he can still feel the lingering touch at his shoulder and he has to do something to shake it off. For some reason it terrifies him that he can't let go. That he can't shake free from an invisible grasp, because the more he thinks about it, the more he knows there's no hiding here. Not with Adam. There's no one to hide behind, nothing else to lay bare but himself. He's grown so used to his own lies, telling strangers someone else's life story, that sometimes Peter thinks he's forgotten his own.
Glancing up at empty buildings, Peter starts on an avid hunt for other words, other things to fill in the cavernous silence that seems to have swept over everything. Peter simply wants to fill it all back in, make everything right, to make Adam feel like he belongs somehow in this place that no one should fit into. Which is exactly why he's heading straight for his apartment, the one place in this ghost town that Peter feels as if he even has a place.
"If i'd known that this was going to be the next time, I would've told you to wait for awhile," he says, and Peter can only hope that Adam can hear the truth in his voice. There's nothing left for Peter to be but honest with the other man. He's leveling himself out, no matter the consequence, for Adam to tear apart or do with that he will. "I know you don't belong here, and I can't... fix it, but-" Pulling a hand out of his pocket, he holds something over to Adam, keeping his gaze straight ahead. Peter lets the glasses that had shown up from their previous time together dangle from his fingers, "You didn't show up because of the place, you showed up because of me."
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Lifting his face once more onto the sight of empty streets, Peter notes that Adam's presence alone makes things feel far less darkened over, the shadows not nearly as deep. Every time he finds himself stuck here, he spends his time searching. Looking for all the guilt he's tucked away into the corners of his mind, keeping it hidden until he's willing to spare the time to spread it all out, to inspect it until it's all he becomes. But with someone else, with Adam, it's easier to keep all of it covered. Or maybe it's all that much harder.
Just like the touch at his elbow, he can still feel the lingering touch at his shoulder and he has to do something to shake it off. For some reason it terrifies him that he can't let go. That he can't shake free from an invisible grasp, because the more he thinks about it, the more he knows there's no hiding here. Not with Adam. There's no one to hide behind, nothing else to lay bare but himself. He's grown so used to his own lies, telling strangers someone else's life story, that sometimes Peter thinks he's forgotten his own.
Glancing up at empty buildings, Peter starts on an avid hunt for other words, other things to fill in the cavernous silence that seems to have swept over everything. Peter simply wants to fill it all back in, make everything right, to make Adam feel like he belongs somehow in this place that no one should fit into. Which is exactly why he's heading straight for his apartment, the one place in this ghost town that Peter feels as if he even has a place.
"If i'd known that this was going to be the next time, I would've told you to wait for awhile," he says, and Peter can only hope that Adam can hear the truth in his voice. There's nothing left for Peter to be but honest with the other man. He's leveling himself out, no matter the consequence, for Adam to tear apart or do with that he will. "I know you don't belong here, and I can't... fix it, but-" Pulling a hand out of his pocket, he holds something over to Adam, keeping his gaze straight ahead. Peter lets the glasses that had shown up from their previous time together dangle from his fingers, "You didn't show up because of the place, you showed up because of me."